Balance .... Where Did You Go?

I began working at the ripe old age of 18. October 15, 1984 to be exact. And I worked at the same company for over 15 years. From the beginning until March 1986, it was only me to worry about. Not too hard to figure out where I want to go, what I want to eat, not too many clothes to wash, an apartment to keep clean, no lawn to worry with, a few bills to pay, pretty low stress as it were. I was perfectly in balance with me.

Andy and I married in March 1986. From then until 1992, it was again a fairly easy game of balance to play. We were young and care-free. Balancing our daily life: family, church, work, home, and pets was a fairly easy thing to do. We balanced well together.

June 1992. Austin comes along. I went back to work when he was 6 weeks old. September 1996. Chandler comes along. Again, back to work at 6 weeks. With both of these wonderful transitions, I learned there was a little more to balancing life as a working mom and then working mom of two. I should mention that it certainly helps to have a husband who is willing to pull his weight when it comes to housework and caring for our children. I probably wouldn't have had such an easy transition if not for him. ;-)

Fast forward to December 1998. I leave the corporate world to become a stay at home mom. Surprisingly, it took a little bit to find balance in this new phase of life. Once we got there, it's pretty much been smooth sailing for the Bragg family. Here we are today and I feel like balancing life is a challenge again. I'm not even working every day, so what is the problem? Maybe it has something to do with this quote I found: "For many people a job is more than an income – it's an important part of who we are. So a career transition of any sort is one of the most unsettling experiences you can face in your life." ~ Paul Clitheroe

I'm not sure who Paul is, but I think he's on to something here. Maybe what I'm feeling isn't necessarily the loss of balance in my life, but instead unsettled for the moment. Of course, there are are only 15 school days left after today. I'll sub when called upon over the next three weeks and then back to full time stay at home mom for the summer. Oh, I think I see balance just around the bend .....

i'MtheMoM ...

Last week on Monday was my 6th day to sub at the middle school. Thus far, I've subbed for 7th and 8th grades in the subjects of Social Studies and Language Arts. Chandler has escaped the total embarassment of having her mom as her sub. I should mention here that I feel I've made great strides in the realm of subbing at my child's school. Why, you ask? Chandler and a friend actually came to the class I was subbing in the week before. She walked through the door and in my head I hear an angelic choir in unison ... I waited for her to say she was just coming by to say hello and then maybe a hug and my day would be complete ... insert sound of dragging a needle across a (vinyl) record or maybe screeching brakes of a car coming to a stop while traveling at 100 miles an hour - she needed money. Well, I still enjoyed the fact that she came by.

OK, back to my 6th day of subbing. I get a text on the drive to take Chandler to school - they need me to sub in a 6th grade class and I recognize immediately the name as Chandler's science teacher. I get a little nervous as visions of Bill Nye The Science Guy dance in my head, but surely I won't have to perform any experiments! Chandler asks who I'd be subbing for, I tell her, and her slightly delayed response is ... oh, I have her. I then get a quick run down of do's and don'ts. I promise not to embarass her, send her off with all my love, and assure her that this won't be the worst day of her life.

As Chandler and friends arrive to class, I make it a point not to act overly excited to see her. It was sort of funny that we kept slipping each other glances and smiles during class. I couldn't help but stare at her and watch as she worked, but I'd quickly look away when I caught her looking at me. Fast forward to the last period of the day ... as I introduced myself to the class, someone raised their hand and asked ... are you someone's mom? I said yes, Chandler Bragg's. The response? A simple "cool".

The Vent ....

Camping + Rain = me very ill

pic of our little home away from home ~ obviously not taken on this trip

So, we decided to go camping at Fort Yargo for Spring Break since Austin needed to be around for baseball. Fort Yargo is close enough to home that it wouldn't be a huge hassle to drive back and forth for games and practices. Plus, we LOVE to go camping! Can you believe that the last two camping trips we've taken (fall break in October 08 and now spring break April 09) it rained every single day that we were there?! I can handle one day of rain during a camping trip, but the entire trip? Not so much.

We arrived on Tuesday to rain; it stopped and then started again at about 1am on Wednesday morning; rained on and off all day Wednesday; started raining again on Thursday at about 2am and has rained on and off all afternoon again today. Currently (3:56pm 4/2) there is an 80% chance of thunderstorms tonight, which is supposed to be our last night of camping. Yay. And I thought we were in a drought? Maybe I missed a newsflash that we're finished with that?

I know we need the rain and I should be thankful, and I probably will be .... in a few days. I woke up in such a bad mood this morning, but my spirits soon were lifted when Austin sang "I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, where? down in my heart" ..... you know the rest of the song. I did manage a smile and then we played spoons for a long time and that too brought a smile to my face.

Not sure why I'm even writing this post. I'm not overly thrilled and don't have anything great to say. I guess I've come up with one more use for this blog .... venting.

Hail To The Teacher.....

Several weeks ago, I signed up to be a substitute teacher. Of course, it's not as easy as signing up these days. I had to attend a workshop, fill out an application, obtain references, get finger printed (that was fun) and then wait for the school board's approval. With all that said and done, I received my first call last week on Thursday at 8:22am asking if I could be there ready to fill in by 9:30am. Yikes!! I hadn't even showered yet. And it was a Social Studies class! Is that where I teach them geography? I can't get anywhere in Georgia without a GPS or printed Mapquest directions. Or would it be something about the Constitution or how laws are passed? I have a few School House Rock tunes filed away in my brain that could help me through this. My mind was going a mile a minute while I was getting ready. I think I'm glad it was a last minute call so I had less time to stress over my first day.

One of the requirements to become a sub is to attend a 4 hour workshop. The one I attended was led by a woman who is a retired educator. She did a great job squeezing lots of important info into 4 hours. One of the things she stressed to us was not to go away from a subbing job discussing specifics about the teacher you filled in for or the students. While I won't ever give those specific details, I will probably share funny stories or happenings along the way. The other thing that she stressed more than once is do not touch the children. She warned that those Kindergartener's have hug me written all over them .... but DON'T do it. A pat on the head, high five or knuckle bump, nothing more.

I was soooooo nervous on this first assignment because not only was I was subbing for a Social Studies class, but they were 8th graders!! I sort of remember being an 8th grader and I've lived through raising an 8th grader of my own. Everything in their life is VERY important and somewhat dramatic. And they are stuck in that weird place of going from middle school to high school .... they are somebody! The good news is that I had help from neighboring teachers since it was a last minute sub assignment, and everyone still thinks I'm a smart sub. (shhhh) I had 4 different periods of students and each one of them were a good group of kids. Some of them knew me and asked "are you Chandler's mom?" Much to Chandler's dismay, by the time I picked her up that afternoon, she had already heard that I was a sub at her school that day. How embarassing is that? Not for me, but apparently it was for her. I think she ended up feeling OK about it, because my reviews were mostly positive. :-) I returned for a second day of subbing on Friday and much like Thursday, it was a good experience.

My two little days of subbing pale in comparison to the long term committment that teachers have made to make the world a better place by teaching the children!! Take a minute to tell a teacher how much you appreciate them. (then give them a high five) :-)

Where it begins ...

I've owned lots of journals over the years. I've written down random occurrences and memories here and there and even looked back at them from time to time. I also keep a small notepad handy in my purse so I can jot down a fleeting thought or something great I hear or read while I'm on the road. I recently applied to become a substitute teacher (I think this might net me a good story or two) and in telling this via email to my BFFs Dana & Kim, I may have made them laugh a little. At dinner a few nights later, Dana suggested that one day I write a book. I believe the suggestion was based on the emails I've sent to them over time describing different events that have taken place in my life. I do like writing for the enjoyment of others. I find that my stories sound better on paper because my introvert self can be a little more extravert, more creative in word choices and presentation in order to capture my audience's attention.

So, Dana ... I don't know that my stuff is book worthy, but blog worthy? I think maybe. I might pull out an old family, friend, kid or animal story that is too good not to share. I LOVE researching and looking for stuff on the internet. There are LOTS of people out there that are smarter than me and I have bookmarked some of their really cool sites over time; bought their books; and watched their shows on TV. I might even share that kind of stuff. I have friends with cool jobs and hobbies and would love to give them a shout out. Ask anyone who knows me, I don't cook anything well that doesn't come in a box with specific instructions; I can sew on a button, but that's about it; and any place in my house that looks fitting for a live plant is referred to as "the death ledge". Even though I'm not good at those things, there are lots of people I know who are and I'd love to share their ideas and know-how with you. I also have family and friends that I don't get to see often enough and although I keep up with some of them on FaceBook, this too will be a good tool for keeping in touch.

Who knows how often I will post and Lord only knows who will read this thing. I'll make my husband, kids and mom faithful followers of my blog, everyone else ... you're free to choose. :-) And I'm off!!